Friday was school picture day at Michael\u2019s school. Although I still have a sheet of photos from last year\u2019s picture day, I had signed up to buy the least expensive package for two reasons. One, I love my son\u2019s school and I want to help support it (even though I prefer direct financial support\u2026I vented about that over on Momtourage). Secondly, I noticed that on the order form it said that the kids who didn\u2019t buy a package would not be allowed to sit for an individual photo\u2026that they would only be allowed to sit for the class\/group photo. There are enough times in life that my son will be necessarily singled out, so I didn\u2019t want this to be one of them. After I filled out the form, I thought, \u201cYou\u2019re being silly. Kids don\u2019t care if they take individual photos or not.\u201d Oh well, I had already paid. Que sera, sera.<\/p>\n
On the way home from school on Friday, I asked Michael how school picture day went. \u201cIt was good,\u201d he said. \u201cI didn\u2019t do the \u201ccrazy\u201d smile.\u201d (He has the tendency to smile like \u201cThe Joker\u201d for staged photos.) \u201cOh good,\u201d I said\u2026and with that I thought the conversation was over. Then he chimed in, \u201cThe kids with no money didn\u2019t get to take a picture.\u201d What?! He then went on to explain that \u201cthe kids with no money\u201d could only take the picture with the other kids who had money (in other words \u2013 the class\/group shot). I explained to him that just because certain kids didn\u2019t buy photo packages didn\u2019t mean that their families didn\u2019t have any money. \u201cMaybe they just didn\u2019t want<\/strong> to buy any more pictures, because they still had pictures left over from last year\u2026like we do,\u201d I elaborated. Whatever\u2026he had already moved on to another thought.<\/p>\n Later, I reflected on why a thing like mandatory school supply lists and exclusionary school picture days get under my skin so much. In reality, they are not big deals. I came to the conclusion that in my mind these minor situations boil down to the economics of the \u201chaves\u201d and the \u201chave-nots\u201d. Growing up in a family headed by a divorced single mom of five kids, I most definitely found myself in the \u201chave-nots\u201d role at various times in my life. My kids are very fortunate in that they have never lacked for anything\/missed out any opportunity simply based on economic reasons\u2026 and I hope that will always be their reality. In any event, I realize that I will probably always connect emotionally with the \u201chave-nots\u201d and raise my voice for what is best and fair for all<\/strong>, not just the privileged. I\u2019m okay with that. In fact, that\u2019s one of the character traits that I hope to pass on to my kids. <\/p>\n